not just a face in the crowd.

missing you.

come home soon!

♥ with love,
1:38 AM

Monday, November 23, 2009

"where'd you go?

i miss you so,

seems like it's been forever,,

that you've been gone..."

♥ with love,
10:24 PM

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

just came back from Cheng.

wow. i promised myself today that i would go there after ballet exam!

so i had to go, if not i'll hate myself.

HAHA.

anyways.

ballet and contemp technique exams are OVER.

HAHA. i'm done for school. hehe.

exams were okayyyy..

i think i underperformed for both.

but oh well, its over!

so now i'm just gonna concentrate on driving and cheng!

HAHA. i've got a deal with them xDD

okay, im gonna go and sleep.

cuz im bloody tired.

my muscles are so tight!!

i need massage!

anyone?

hehe.

day 4 and i'm still surviving!

i'm so independent.

♥ with love,
10:24 PM

Monday, November 16, 2009

ballet exam tomorrow.
i can't feel a thing.
i think i will only start to get nervous tomorrow!

haha. seesh.
it's 12 plus already, and i'm feeling so hyper.
dearie called me today and we talked for quite awhile..
(:
feels nice to hear his voice.

it's not a "goodbye". only a long "i'll see you later."

♥ with love,
12:20 AM

Saturday, November 14, 2009

I'm in school now with the two other bimbos. Haha.
Practiced for our ballet and contemporary exam earlier and we are going to seok huan soonnnn!
Waiting for Andrea who is in the toilet now. Haha

I think we are going shopping later! :D
hehehe need to destress.
Exams will end on tuesday and I am gonna be freeeee!

Haha. Dad's birthday today. (:
gonna go celebrate later!

Oh and I went to cut my hair yesterday. It is not so thick now. The hairdresser cut more than half my hair away cuz it was too darn thick!
I was like a mophead. Hahaha

Okay. Gotta go now.
Will continue again tonight! (:

♥ with love,
2:23 PM

just left dearie.

cried till i have problems catching my breath.

please be strong, i have to overcome this.

stop crying now.

it's only a month.

♥ with love,
1:58 AM

listening to MLTR together during the last few moments.
how emo. T.T

decided not to go to the airport tomorrow.
he'll be gone by 9am.
so when i wake up, he'll be gone.

still at his place & i will go home soon..
sobsob.

♥ with love,
12:36 AM

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

i'm done with my theory exams!

i think it's quite screwed.

): but hopefully i'll pass.

technique exams will be next week.

and dearie will be gone in like 3 days.

oh my goodness.

i still don't know how am i gonna face it.

i'm still living these 3 days normally.. treasuring every moment.

because he will be away for nearly a month.

i know its only 25 days.

but then he'll be back for a few days, and he'll be gone again.

somehow, im not looking forward to my december holidays.

): and i'm just gonna make myself damn busy.

so i will not think of him too badly.

its gonna be the first time every we won't see each other for such a long time.

i really can't imagine what will happen.

SEE ! always so dependent on him.. now when he's away, i feel weird.

and i don't think i will wanna send him off.

because i don't wanna be crying.

and i don't wanna let him see me cry either.

i'm counting down...

now i start counting down to when he leaves.

and soon, i'll start counting down to when he'll be back.

and then he leaves again and comes back again.

i'm sure in future, i'll be used to it. (i hope...)

sigh.

gotta be independent.

♥ with love,
12:28 AM

Saturday, November 07, 2009

hey all!

alfred would be promoting his new album tomorrow.

sunday, 8th nov.

2pm @ 900 woodlands drive , #01-03 Woodlands Civic Centre

please go and support if you all are free!

and the MV is officially out.

please have a good laugh (:

it's supposed to be corny.

Click here!

♥ with love,
2:46 PM

Wednesday, November 04, 2009

"life is a journey of infinite possibilities.

a choice in time aligns a path that makes this present moment.

what would happen if another path were chosen?

if only..."

♥ with love,
11:03 PM

Monday, November 02, 2009

dance festival is finally over.

i'm relieved, because one huge burden is gone.

but i have learnt a lot from this performance..

im too tired now.

shall talk about it another day.

thank you everyone for the support and sms-es.

i appreciate it a lot! :D

good night everyone!

i think my body needs to rest.

feel so injured.

♥ with love,
12:21 AM

Monday, October 26, 2009

just came back from the project x concert!

wow, they are really amazing!

really entertaining and full of energy.

i think our dancing should be like theirs.

(in terms of energy level)

anyways. i think my dancing today was horrible!

it was a really OFF day, especially in the morning.

and tammy talked to us, saying that this is production week.

we should step up to it and our journey only starts now.

which i think it's true.. although albert might think we are lousy dancers.

it's not the point anymore, because the point now is to have a good show.

i think i should start pushing myself every day.

i only have 4 days left.

i have to focus.

no time for fun now.

gotta buck up!

believe in myself and claim the space and movement.

focus and not slide in and out of pieces.

i know i can!!

but sometimes i just think i suck. ):

can't seem to immerse myself entirely in the piece.

i need more emotions.

the show means a lot to all of us.

so we must have a good one.

jia you everyone!

♥ with love,
11:46 PM

Sunday, October 25, 2009

wow, i can't believe that my weekends are coming to an end!

i spent half of my sat and sun doing my history essay!

and now its already like 735pm!

and next week is gonna be a long week!

its esplanade showing next week!

and i think i'll be spending every almost every single day at esplanade this week.

mon: watching project x

tues: rehearsal and watching paloma herrera

wed: shen wei workshop

fri: rehearsal.

sat: performance day!

sun: performance day!

bleh.

im excited yet nervous about it.

because i don't know if i can last for 3 consecutive pieces.

i mean lasting is not a problem, but being able to be at my best or not might be a problem.

i hope i'll be able to do it!

oh, and recently i realize that i keep eating a lot.

haha, like i keep feeling hungry.

like nowwwww...

this is damn bad la.

i think if this goes on, i cannot fit into Alice's anorexic skirt for hsien fa's piece.

hahaha. so fat!

i should console myself by saying alice is damn thin!

HAHA. anyways.

i think my body isn't at it's best condition now.

my knees hurt, and my toe is still swollen.

i think my last toe is like numb..

-.-

okay, i should stop whining!

okay, off to dinner now.

mommy is cooking yummy claypot rice! :D

hehehe.

♥ with love,
7:34 PM

Friday, October 23, 2009

i love fridays!

looking forward to fridays because it's the end of the week.

although friday is a longggg day, but at least i have the weekends.

but i think this weekend is gonna be a busy weekend.

gotta go get my costume

and do homework.

and sort out all my steps.

i think melissa's piece is getting better.

but i'm still afraid.

not clean, not sharp, not enough stamina.

but i think doing it full out 3 times for every rehearsal really helps train stamina.

i don't feel that i wanna die anymore.

HAHA. that means i've become stronger! (yeah, maybe like 1%)

-.-

anyways.

i've got my iphone and i'm loving it! :D

hehehe.

have a good weekend people!

i'll be back for more.

♥ with love,
10:05 PM

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

i'm feeling so tired.
today class was bad. i was so dead.
both for contemp and ballet.

i think because i didn't have enough sleep!
i keep dreaming when im asleep.
OMG> i really hate it.
because my mind is not resting..and when i wake up, i feel as if i've just watched a whole entire movie or something.
i'm still damn tired even when i wake up.

this cannot go on..
if this goes on, i'll die, literally.
there's so many things going on now..

my essays will be due soon.
need to do our looking at dance project.
need to practice my dance.
prepare for dance practical exams.
theory exams.
dance science. (it's killing me)
get costumes.
sleep.

i think my body is feeling stress.
keep having headaches.
grrr. this sucks.
please let me last until friday, then at least i have the weekend to rest.
oh wait, not really REST.
but at least i can have a break.

i need a kit kat.
okay, lame.

anyway, me, andrea and puiman were talking today that we wish our lives were like the movie "click"
haha. you can fast-forward the unpleasant parts and slow mo the pleasant ones.
then we were saying that we can slow mo our sleep. and fast forward class time.
hehehe.
then this lazy puidiot, say she'd just skip the whole class one. HAHA
-.-

whatver.
okay, my mind is not functioning.
these days, even chocolates won't help
because i don't even crave for it anymore.
):
this is damn sad.
i dont know why. i don't have the strong urge to eat chocolates anymore.
but chocolates are anti depressant!

bah.
i dont know what's wrong with me.
1 more month.
i know i can do this!

persevere!
mind over body.
mind over body.
mind over body.

♥ with love,
11:07 PM

Monday, October 19, 2009

i've got so much to do, and so little time.
i need more SLEEP.

we did a full run of the esplanade show today.
and i think my solo is still like crap.
i don't know how am i going to pull it through.
i have 12 more days to prefect it.

i think i'm still not confident.
my movements are too small.
i am not projecting and enjoying myself on stage.
i'm worrying too much about the steps.

& thank you puiman for giving me notes and comments!
i meant a lot to me (:
i love you hairy puiter! hehe.

i need to practice.
i need more confidence!
because sometimes when i dance, i don't really feel myself in it.
i think my body and face cannot express how i feel.
sometimes i don't know what an honest movement is.

what is considered as beautiful?
hmm..

12 days.
that's all i have.

♥ with love,
10:37 PM

Sunday, October 18, 2009

sorry i have not been blogging!

but yeah, im back! :D

(just a chop chop entry!)

i have to do tammy's journal soonnnnnn..

anyways. my 19th birthday was great! :D

(i didn't know i share the same birthday as hsien fa! hahaha)

celebrated with my family the day before, and with dearie on the actual day.

it was a normal school day, so we didn't really had crazy plans!

but we had a nice dinner (:

went to this japanese fusion restaurant along river valley road.

the food was GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!

ambience was good.

service was excellent.

& price was reasonable too!

yeps.

didn't really feel like my birthday tho. but yeah, had a great time!

and i wanna thank everyone for their wishes! (:

especially my rilong and huawei! your sms-es and calls from auzzieland meant a lot to me! :D

yeah. and all the presents!

thank you lasalle dancers for your "gay" present!

thank you everyone!

love you all.

i feel so fortunate and blessed to have such good family and friends!

& thank you dearie for your wonderful surprise!

you managed to hide everything rather well. (:

and you made me tear you moron.. "i cannot believe it!"

HAHAHA.

feel so touched that the first song you learn on the guitar was happy birthday.

thank you dearie for my splendid day!

love you.

anyways, pictures of the food and us.

haha. the place was kinda dark. these are the only few pictures that we used flash.

because it was embarrassing to keep using flash for every photo. -.-

and i always eat the food, then i realized that i haven't got a picture of it.

HAHA. im just too greedy!

our 7 course dinner.

but i've only got like a few >.<

so sorry!

this was like scallop, prawn, and escargot.

this was the yummy beeffffffff!

okay! that's all on my birthday.

im now 19, but i dont really feel it.

HAHA, i know im old, so please don't rub into it.

-.-

and yes, i'm now in hsien fa's piece.

it was what i wanted since a long long time ago.

so i really hope i don't screw it up.

>.<

anyways, da!ns festival is coming up!

lasalle's dance show would be on 31st october and 1st november!

please let me know if you are interested, or you can just get tickets from sistic!

♥ with love,
12:15 PM

Monday, October 12, 2009

woohoo.

its now week 11/15, time passes really fast!

looking forward to esplanade show! :D

3 more weeks and that's it!

have been rehearsing quite a bit..

today, when we were blocking, tammy asked me to block for the second half of the solo.

i blanked out.

literally, my mind was like empty.

although the steps were taught to me like 2 hours ago.

but it wasn't an excuse, i just felt so dumb.

like i was in the middle of the room, and i blank out.

i'm such a moron!

i cannot screw up for the solo, if not i'm so so so so so dead.

i need to work hard and practice the steps until it is in my body.

for now, the steps are still new to my body..

WORK HARD SUDHEE!

anyway, today was quite a bad day for me too.

class was like badddd.

i can't turn properly and i can't balance!!

i think today is just one of my "off" days, but IT IS NOT AN EXCUSE.

okay, i should stop complaining and work hard.

work my ass off, so i wont feel so guilty eating!

haha.

sigh, i need to focus and concentrate more.

be consistent, that's what melissa and peishan always tell me.

okay.

work hard.

be consistent.

concentrate.

focus.

facial expression.

balance.

extensions.

turns.

jumps.

& never ever give up.

that's what i have to work on.

40 more mins to my birthday.

i better enjoy the last few moments of being 18. (:

CIAO.

♥ with love,
11:09 PM

Sunday, October 11, 2009

i have been sleeping at really unearthly hours during the weekends.

this is so bad.

caught (500) days of summer!

and i think this show is so sad.

after watching it, my heart felt really empty.

& i think the worst thing that can ever happen is to see the person you love marry someone else.

oh well.

anyways, yongxin's 21st birthday party was fun! :D

haha. hope you had fun girl!

i think i have been eating a lot recently.

>.<

cakes, chocolates, frappes.

oh my goodness.

i don't wanna know how much calories i have consumed.

okay, i'll work hard in class! so i can burn off all the calories

BURN BURN BURN!!

but i always feel that the weekends end wayyyyy to fast.

because i hardly have enough time for rest and play.

and school starts again.

i'm whining so much now because i'm having pre monday blues.

hahaha. i'm such a puss.

♥ with love,
11:42 PM

Wednesday, October 07, 2009

okay! dearie's departure date has more or less been confirmed.

it's gonna be sometime in mid november.

so i have about one more month with him..

and he'll be gone for about a month.

yes, a whole entire month.

and i'm already counting down..

i dread that day would come too quickly.

and i don't have much time left.

minus the time i have for rehearsals.

minus the time preparing for the esplanade shows.

minus the time preparing for technique exams.

minus the time writing essays.

im left with like what almost nothing?!?!

both of us has so many other commitments.

so technically, i have wayyyyyy less than one month.

sigh.

i don't know how am i going to survive this period.

it's gonna feel so weird.

i think i need to mentally prepare myself now...

so by the time he leaves, i will not cry my eyes out.

oh well.

concentrate on what i have to do for now first...

i don't want to think about this now either.

i'll just treasure whatever i have now. (:

♥ with love,
10:46 PM

Tuesday, October 06, 2009

phew!

i can't believe that i finished my essay in 2 hours!

i'm like brain dead now.

french revolution.

i hate the french revolution.

why did it even happen. -.-

make me waste all my brain juice!

okay, i think i need to sleep

my brain needs it.

good night world!

eliz: YAY! thank you, you jia you too okay! :D

wanrong: hehe. i'll let you know when is dains fest! keep in touch!

rilong: hey cousin! good to hear from you! how are you? take care and see you real soon!

♥ with love,
11:50 PM